Dating Today

If the first few dates go well, but it never turns into more, are you left wondering what men want in a relationship? Are you tired of always having to start over in your quest to share your life with someone? Have you seen other couples together and wonder how they make it work? Figuring out what men want when they get involved in a relationship may not be the mystery you think it is.

Men Are Simpler Than Most Women Think

Men are usually pretty open and logical. They are a lot more of the "what you see is what you get" kind of people than women are. When a guy asks a girl out on a date, he is doing so because he is attracted to her. Initially the attraction may be purely physical and if it stays at that level it's no wonder that a relationship never gets off the ground.

It's a case of be careful what you wish for. If you go out of your way to look and act sexy in order to attract men, don't be surprised when they respond to that and ignore whatever else you have going for you.

Learn How Men Think

Logically, if they see a woman dressing sexy and acting the same way, they are going to conclude that she is looking for a good time, not a long time relationship. You can predict what men want pretty easily in this case.

It might serve you better to use your feminine wiles but leave something to the imagination. Then once you have his attention, turn it from how you look to what you're all about.

Besides the appeal of being with an attractive woman, men are looking for someone they can have some fun with, someone to talk to, and someone who has some of the same interests that he does.

Don't Forget The Fun Factor

A woman who is fun to be with is also someone who is easy to be with. There is no stress and things are lighthearted and easy. And to get the relationship started off on the right foot, this might be all that is needed. If you get a man to commit to a few more times together, he may actually start talking about some things that matter to him.

This is the danger zone when things get better or come to an abrupt end. At this point a man is still going to be cautious about making a commitment. He needs to feel that even though you may be going out regularly, he still has his freedom. Whatever you do, don't threaten this freedom. Give him all the space he wants and all the time he needs to spend time with his friends.

Realistically, even if he really likes you, if you start to make too many demands, he may decide he is not ready for a commitment like that. And then you'll be back at square one again. By understanding what men want, and then following through so they get it, you can have that relationship you're dreaming of.

Want to know more about what men REALLY want in a relationship? Then I'd love to help you out!

To read more about how to make a man love you, click Signs He Wants You. You'll learn all the secrets to make a man Fall in Love with you.

Kimberly White is a dating and relationship expert. Her passion is to write informative articles for women who want to improve their love lives. Visit her site for more information.

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With the pace of the busy world today, most people don't have time to play games anymore. Most likely, you've been done with those games since elementary school. Finding someone to date can be complicated and you can feel like you hit a brick wall every time. You find yourself running into the same issues with the opposite sex, but you can't figure out why. Well, in this article, it defines the different types of girls or guys that you should avoid. Maybe you recognize a few or even avoid a couple of these. But you still need more info to understand how to recognize these people you should not get involved with. Below you'll find 5 types of guys to avoid and 5 types of girls to avoid:

5 Guy Types to Avoid

1. Mr. Clingy

Mr. Clingy is obviously clingy and never wants to leave your side. If you like space, you won't get it with this guy. He'll always want to know who, what, where, when and why. Some may be extreme and controlling, but others may just pout a little too much. He'll want to be by your side at every event, outing, family function, and any other occasion you step out of your house to attend. If he could sit beside you at work and stare at your face all day, he would. The reason you should avoid these types is that a guy like this shows his insecurity with his need to constantly connect to you. Your guy should be strong enough to be who he is (the same goes for ladies), without being defined by you. If you're ever to develop a healthy relationship built on a firm foundation, don't expect it to be with this guy.

2. The Stalker

Just the title of this one sounds scary, and rightfully so! The stalker stalks and not in a harmless way. The stalker has an obsession and you are his target. He knows everything you are doing and where you are,all the time. He'll find excuses to be around you or within your circle. And with Facebook so popular nowadays, you will find him constantly on your page or asking you about statuses, pictures, etc. on Facebook. In extreme cases, you may have to change your number or have a call block because he constantly texts, calls, etc.

3. The Player

Players are charming, cute, and sexy, but inside they're typically not able to offer so much of themselves. Players become that way for different reasons, whether they just got out of a relationship or they want to see how many people they can be with or they want constant companionship but don't want to be with the same woman, etc. Some people think they can change a player, it happens. But, overall, unless you stand out as being as amazing as the seven wonders of the world, you will most likely not be able to break down his world. If you're looking for a fun, thrilling time; the player's your guy. If you're looking for stability and love, players just don't have it in themselves to give you that.

4. Momma's Boy

This one seems harmless, but once you are deep into a relationship with a momma's boy, you'll see his mom is part of it too. There are momma's boys who are fully capable of having a relationship, then there are those who really couldn't live without their moms. You'll know when you've found one because he constantly seeks his mom's opinions in matters of your relationship. Or even worse, he could be telling his mom every detail about your relationship. This is unhealthy because in his mom's eyes, you'll never be good enough. She knows if she keeps her son close, she will never be replaced as the number one woman in his life. This guy will not get you anywhere. Because, in the end, with mom around, along with his dependency on her, it'll never be husband and wife.

5. The Cheater

Cheating is sometimes (rarely) forgivable. I've seen rare occurrences where it made the relationship stronger. But for the most part, cheating is hard to recover from. You can't judge someone by past relationships, because they were most likely a different person. Plus, they most likely feel differently about someone from their past than you. If they own up to it, that's important too. It shows they accept their actions. Dating a cheater is pretty much a living hell. It's disrespectful, sneaky, shallow, and an easy cop out. One, a cheater shows no respect and consideration to his current partner by just letting himself without even considering the thought of a different person. Two, for this to happen, they most likely have to hide it and not be truthful to someone. Every single person deserves honesty, so they can make their decisions accordingly. It's shallow for one to just jump from one relationship to think that this new, exciting someone will meet their needs. If someone is looking elsewhere, then they should at least be a person with dignity. And cut your current someone loose. It's the right thing to do.

Five Types of Girls to Avoid

1. Ms Dependent

Ms. Dependent is the equivalent of Mr. Clingy, except that Ms. Dependent cannot survive on her own. For every little thing in her life, she needs your help. She chooses to count on you every single time and expects you to help every single time. Doing something on her own is difficult for her. So instead of figuring it out, she'll just wait around until you can do it. I've seen women who won't even drive. She will always plan her schedule around you and waits for you to be available. This type of girl is difficult because although you are the man, she still has to carry her share and be able to take care of herself.

2. Ms Independent

Ms. Independent can handle it all, she rarely gives a guy a chance to help her. She's stubborn, holds her ground, and is difficult to compromise with. Sometimes Ms. Independent can go as far as not listening to you at all or even think she's right about everything. It's always about compromising in a relationship and working on a solution together. No one is right all the time and no one is wrong the entire time. Relationships take 100% on each person's part, so if someone's not giving that, you won't have a deeply connected relationship for very long.

3. Ms. Gold Digger

Every girl likes to be spoiled and have nice things. But the gold digger is the girl who is just looking to your earning and purchasing power. She sees wants to know how many things it can buy for her. If you were to be broke or be earning less, you'd see the back side of her, as she walks out. This is a girl who values materialistic items more than love from you or love for you. A real relationship is based on two people really loving and caring for each other. You won't find that from her. Her love is the love of money. Being in a relationship with a gold digger is not really a relationship with you, but a relationship between her and your money. If you want a woman who really cares and loves you, don't look for it from the gold digger.

4. Ms. High Maintenance

Ms High Maintenance is the equivalent of a car that needs constant trips to the mechanic. She needs constant attention from you. She has a lot of needs and most likely isn't willing to compromise. She may be someone who only wants things a certain way, from the clothes she wears to the way she does household chores. It's difficult to compromise with her because she wants her way. Some may even go as far as to depend on your for everything little thing, from her car to her house maintenance. If you're prepared to be giving this much attention, you may be okay. But more often than not, she'll drain you, leave you frustrated, and having no say so in the relationship.

5. Ms. Insecure

There's a little bit of insecurity in everyone, but these types of girls have high levels of insecurity. This is the girl who needs constant reassurance on a daily basis of how you feel for her or about how beautiful she is. Anytime you're upset, she constantly thinks it's her fault. These ladies are difficult to be with because 1) you can't start a relationship if either party is not confident in themselves. Insecure people don't even really know who they are themselves. If they did, they would be confident in everything they do. Relationships need a foundation to build on, and having an insecure girl is not.

Of course, you can be in relationships with people. But through experience, it proves itself true that these types of people are best to avoid. It's always best to enter relationships with healthy people. And that is difficult to find. Healthy people will be honest, responsible, confident in themselves, respectful, and able to stand on their own two feet. Dating isn't about finding someone to depend on, it's about finding someone you can together create a great relationship, an understanding, and a strong bond. You should strengthen each other, not drain each other.

Someone to Desire (STD), formerly smalltowndating is your resource for answers, laughs, and entertainment in the dating world.

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Having jitters on the first date is completely normal. After all, the first date represents the possibility that you may be going out with your future husband on your very last first date. Or it means you're headed for an evening with a total loser, which is always a bummer. Either way, the first date is the epitome of the unknown, and it requires a spirit of fearlessness to take a chance and go out with someone for the first time.

There's no reason a dynamic diva like you should worry yourself silly and obsess about making a good first impression. A successful first date requires nothing more than a little mental preparation, a strong sense of self and a comfortable pair of shoes. Feeling nervous about a first date? Not to worry. Following these first date dos and don'ts will take the guesswork out of the evening and put you back in the power seat.

Do dress to impress......yourself.

The most important thing to remember about a first date is that you want to be as comfortable in your own skin as possible. The best way to do this is to dress in an outfit that flatters you and makes you feel confident. Select an outfit because it makes you feel at ease, not because you're trying to impress your date. He'll think you look amazing no matter what you wear.

Do expect to go mountain climbing.

You don't want to show up to your date in new heels that pinch your toes or have the propensity to make you trip or fall. You may think you don't need to worry about shoes because you'll be sitting at a table or in a movie all night. Think again - he may have other date ideas. You may have a long hike from the car to the restaurant, or he may want to continue the date with a walk in the park or an evening of dancing - who knows! Be prepared to be on your feet all night and select your shoes accordingly.

Do come ready with interesting things to talk about.

One of the biggest fears associated with a first date is the awkward silence. If you show up to your date well-versed on current events, you'll put yourself ahead of the game. Practice a great joke or two in front of the mirror before your big night, and you'll have the perfect anecdote for a lull in the conversation when it shows up. Having opinions about political issues or spiritual matters will also come in handy if you feel the need to further the conversation on your first date.

Do ask questions, but stay away from clichés.

Asking a man, "So, what do you do?" is played out. So is asking him what his sign is or to describe his ideal woman. You want to let this guy know you're a cut above the rest. Set yourself apart as a fabulous first date by demonstrating a sense of originality and striking up an unconventional conversation. I have used what I call "The Question Game" to get me through many a first date.

I'll say, "So, do you want to play The Question Game? I ask you a question, you ask me a question. No question is off limits and you must answer every question honestly."

No man has ever told me he didn't want to play and it always makes for an interesting evening.

Don't get drunk.

Getting smashed on a first date is an absolute no-no. For starters, you need to keep your wits about you at all times - you don't want to put yourself in a position where you might be taken advantage of. Secondly, most men get turned off quick by an inebriated woman. You don't want to say or do anything you might regret on a first date, and you don't want anything to cloud your judgment as you size up your date. Stay away from the alcohol.

Don't eat ribs or anything with poppy seeds.

If you go to dinner on a first date, be careful what you order. Don't choose foods that are messy or make you look ridiculous while you're eating. Also keep in mind food sticks to the teeth and creates a memory not soon forgotten. Chances are, the guy won't tell you if you have a hunk of pepper in your teeth. He'll let you go the entire evening looking like a fool and never call you again. It is perfectly acceptable, by the way, to excuse yourself to the ladies room to check your pearly whites before you order dessert.

Don't have any expectations.

Go on your date with a completely open mind. Don't expect him to open your door, pull out your chair or act like a gentleman. If you expect him to behave a certain way and he doesn't, the date will be a real let down. If you build him up in your mind as Mr. Perfect, you will surely be disenchanted when he falls off the pedestal you've built for him. Expectations are a set up for disappointment, which may cause you to forego a second date with a perfectly good catch. Find out who he is by observing his natural behavior and do your best to stay free from judgment.

Remember, the journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step and the relationship of a thousand kisses begins with the first date. Stay true to these dos and don'ts and soon, you'll be strolling Lover's Lane with your new man.

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Are you wondering how to communicate better with your guy? Would you like to know the best ways to talk to your guy so he really pays attention? Would you like to know what you should say so you're on his mind all the time? It's important to learn the best ways to talk to your guy, so you can become closer and closer.

The Different Kinds Of "Talking"

All talking is not the same. There's low quality talking which is chatting and then there's high quality talking which is communicating. To really talk to your guy and make it matter, you want to be communicating and not just chatting.

Yes of course there will be times when you are just idly talking about how great the weather is. Or you may talk to exchange some information, like when you need to get your plans for the evening straight, or find out what to get at the grocery store. Chatting together is important because it serves a purpose.

Communication In A More Serious Relationship

But to have a meaningful relationship, you need to spend time talking in other ways. And talking doesn't have to have that negative connotation that guys think about when they hear a girl say that she wants to talk. That's enough to make a guy inwardly break out in a sweat.

Make no mistake; the serious does have a place in a relationship, but it doesn't have to be center stage all the time. In fact if you keep the lines of communication open with lots of the lighthearted, you'll be surprised just how much can really be said.

The Art And Science Of Teasing

A little teasing goes a long way. When you tease him, you're letting him know how comfortable you feel with him and how much fun you think he is. This back and forth banter appeals to a guy more than you might think and leaves him with a warm feeling.

The same can be said for the comfortable flirting that happens between two people who know each other really well. It's a great way of telling him that you love him without actually coming out and saying it. It's also a way of ensuring that when you use the, I love you words, that he'll take notice.

It Takes Two To Tango

Communication is even better when it's a special thing that's shared only between the two of you. This is the look that's reserved for only him and the whisper that tells him how much you care, or maybe what you have planned for him later.

These messages are best delivered in a public place before you go your separate ways for the day, or when you're rushed, so he can enjoy the thought but is forced to wait to do anything about it. And you can be sure he'll be thinking about your message in the meantime.

It's well worth learning how to talk to your guy, to build an even better relationship together. Would you like to learn how? Then I'd love to help you out!

To read more about how to make a man love you, click Signs He Wants You. You'll learn all the secrets to make a man Fall in Love with you.

Evangeline Harris is a dating and relationship expert. Her passion is to write informative articles for women who want to improve their love lives. Visit her site for more information.

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When you go on a first date with a new guy, you may be wondering what he's thinking. This is the true account of what most guys think as the date progresses. News Flash: He's mostly thinking about sex. He can't help it. Guys are bred to think about sex every minute of every day. Some have learned to hide it and others aren't so successful at hiding it. Regardless if he's polite or a perv, here is what he is likely thinking from the time he picks you up on your first date until the time he drops you off at night.

The First Meet

He could be picking you up or he could be meeting you in a public restaurant. Regardless, the first time he lays eyes on you he's thinking how great you look. He's also thinking about how to describe how you look to his friends later on. As long as you dress nice, you'll win in this department. Show a little skin and you win even more. Oh yeah, he's also thinking about how you look naked under your clothes. You should be flattered. It's a compliment.

During The Date

As you two are eating, dancing, walking along the boardwalk or whatever else you find yourself doing on your first date, he's thinking what it must be like to kiss you. As you ask him questions, he's trying to be on his best behavior. He gives you careful answers. He wants you to form the least amount of negative opinions about him so that you two can possibly have sex later.

The Goodbye

As you two say goodnight after your first date, he's carefully plotting his good night kiss. He's looking for the exact time to plant one on you. If he seems distracted, it's for good reason. The good night kiss on a first date is horribly nerve-wracking for a guy. As he kisses you, he's thinking that hopefully he'll get to experience much more of you later on.

This should give you some insight into what guys are really thinking on a first date. The good guys are the ones who have learned to hide their thoughts. These are the guys who will show you a good time and make sure you're having fun, all the while disguising their lustful thoughts. The good guys know that, even though they may be thinking of sex the entire time while on a first date, it is best to hide the sex until the time is right. Find those types of guys and you'll be more likely to find the whole package.

Men aren't the only ones who think of sex on a first date. Ladies, go here if you want to know if they guy you are dating is good in bed on a first date.

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Is he dating you, but not committing to you? Most times, you're just inches away from making him commit to a more serious, more permanent relationship with you. Here are three ways to give him that little nudge he needs!

#1 - Know How To Cook.

Believe it or not, but when you know how to cook, your attractiveness to the right kinds of men skyrocket! Despite the change in times, deep down inside men still long to settle down with a woman who has a knack for cooking and other domestic activities.

Have you ever heard of the phrase: "He brings home the bacon, she cooks it"? That still holds true today! Among the most attractive traits commitment-ready men look for in women today, domestic support is very close to the top of the list.

So, can you cook? Maybe it's finally time to learn!

#2 - Make Him Wait For Sex.

Many of us think that the more we please him, the faster he falls in love. Unfortunately, that's not how it works. How many times have you had sex with a guy early in your relationship... only to see him shut down a few days after, and tell you he's "not ready to commit?"

When sex comes too early in the relationship, he falls out of love quickly. After all, you didn't give love a chance to take root in the first place! Only when you're truly, deeply in love with each other will sex strengthen your relationship instead of ruin it!

So how long should you wait for sex? If you can't wait until after the wedding, then give yourself 3-6 months. Most commitment-phobic men lose interest after you refuse sex for 2 months.

#3 - Don't Push The Issue.

One of the biggest reasons why most relationships fail is because the woman pushes the relationship. She asks questions like, "So what are we, really?" "Are we officially dating?" "Do you have any plans of committing to me anytime soon?"

Pushing the issue is a dangerous thing to do. Remember, it's the guy's job to take the lead in the relationship. If you start doing HIS job, he's going to feel like he's the woman in the relationship -- and then bad things happen.

My advice? Don't push. Instead, PULL!

Pull him closer to you by being intellectually and emotionally attractive, knowing how to flirt, and basically showing him how "wife-material" you really are. And even if he won't respond to your invitation, sooner or later, someone more deserving of your love will!

Want to know more about how to pull him closer and make him commit? Then I'd love to help you!

To read more about how to make a man love you, click Signs He Wants You. You'll learn all the secrets to make a man Fall in Love with you.

Evangeline Harris is a dating and relationship expert. Her passion is to write informative articles for women who want to improve their love lives. Visit her site for more information.

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Did you just get the mobile number of a girl that you like? Do you feel great about yourself, but don't know what to say in your first text or how to ask her for a date through text? Naturally, you wouldn't want to ruin things, so here are the top texting tips that can significantly increase your overall chances of winning your dream girl over through text.

1. Don't wait too long to text her.

If you just got a girl's mobile number, following the top texting tips would mean that you have to text her right away. Just keep things short, but cute and say something like, "Hey, it's Dan. Get home safe." A text like this would be great since it doesn't demand a response, but will still ensure that she gets your phone number in return.

2. Be selective about which texts you reply to.

If there is one incredibly important thing that these top texting tips should teach you, it's that you don't need to reply to every single text message that a girl sends you.

If sends you a negative text message, for example, feel free not to reply. Just relax and text her again the following day while pretending like you never got her negative text to begin with.

3. Use emoticons.

No matter how funny or playful you might be in person, it might be hard to communicate your playfulness over text. What most guys don't seem to realize is that using emoticons can be very helpful in this department. Try it out sometime!

4. Time things right.

The amount of time that you take to reply to a text message happens to be very important, too. If it takes the girl 10 minutes to send you a reply, yet you reply to her right away, this will just go to show that she has more value than you overall. Ideally, you should mix things up a bit and take your time to reply sometimes, and then reply right away at other times. In other words: keep her guessing.

Although it is nice to time things right, you shouldn't always think about timing, though. Your overall goal should still be to keep busy and meet as many girls as possible - remember that. If you have a lot of things going on for you, the timing should start to come naturally in no time. Hopefully, these top texting tips will help you out on your journey.

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